Meme A Lema Ding Dong

Here is a Meme.

Accent: Tall Southern woman. I say fixin’, ya’ll and when asked if I want sweeturun, I take sweet please.

Booze: I don’t drink the spirits but sometimes I wish I did so I could come home after a long day and have a “cocktail” in a glamorous glass with an umbrella in it. But let’s not kid ourselves, if I were a drinker, I wouldn’t be the cocktail type...I’d be the wino embarrassing drunk type. (thus...why I avoid)

Chore I Hate: Yes, I hate chores.

Dogs/Cats: Minnie Dog, the greatest pet ever. And why would anyone have a cat? Cats are pointless and snobby. I don’t like snobs.

Essential electronics: TV – my second true love. I have a life-long love affair with TV. TV makes me laugh and cry. TV tells me secrets and teaches me about things like how celebrities can’t cook and the Hanso Foundation. I love TV. I’m pretty sure I would give up my washer and drye...and my microwave oven...before I’d give up TV.

Favorite perfume/cologne: Just walking within fifty feet of the perfume counters at the mall gives me an ugly migraine. I hate the smelly smells. I use soap and a smile. If that isn’t enough then that is just too bad.

Gold/Silver: Silver (or white gold) exclusively – although in high school I rocked a GOLD NUGGET class ring and a giant gold coin necklace YO.

Hometown: Wherever I park my car – currently the outskirts of Nashville, TN – home of Dolly Parton and the Christian Music Industry. One of these things THRILLS me. Guess which one?

Insomnia: Not necessarily, but lately my body is calling out for sleep in a primal scream that only my dog can hear. I need it. I need the sleep.

Job Title: Director of Sales and Marketing for a semi-indie/semi-corporate rock label. This means I now work for The Man and share a bathroom with 35 other women. But it also means that I have kick butt health insurance.

Kids: Someday soon – which fills me with fright and delight and panic and dread and extreme happiness – equally.

Living Arrangements: Illingworth Manor – a small house in the suburbs with Perfect Ryan and Minnie Dog. We love our house even though we are surrounded by neighbors so obsessed with their yards that they use leaf blowers and weed eaters and lawn mowers at SEVEN IN THE MORNING.

Most Admired Trait: Adaptability

Number of Sexual Partners: One, although I won’t tell you who.

Overnight Hospital Stays: One – when I was in college. I had dehydrated from excessive vomiting and diarrhea from excessive stress from excessive life situations. My college roommates came to my hospital room and washed my hair (which was FOUL) and put deodorant on me. I will never forget that.

Phobias: Sharks and people with abnormally tiny hands. And losing Ryan – I’m terrified of that.

Quote: “That’s one of my jobs when I go home…grooming my parents.” -Charity the Intern

Religion: Christianity – the one true constant in my life.

Siblings: One brother, Drew. He’s the kind of brother that surprises you with his astute observations and mature outlook on life while maintaining the wackiest sense of humor known to man. Drew rules. Period.

Time I usually wake up: Too late. Or when Minnie Dog, who weighs 16 pounds, stands directly on my breasts and stares at me while breathing loudly...I also wake up then.

Unusual talent: I can touch the tip of my nose with my tongue.

Vegetable: Potatoes. Ok, look, I don’t really like “vegetables”. I know that makes some of you gasp and fall down dead, but I just don’t. I don’t. But I do drink carrot juice every day and I take a multi-vitamin. Give a girl a break.

Worst habit: Not eating vegetables.

X-rays: You might remember a few months ago when my pointless surgery was rescheduled due to a freak toe incident? Yeah, that toe incident cost me more money than my entire surgery. Stupid x-rays.

Yummy foods I make: Grapes (trust me) and cheese dip and lasagna and chicken pot pie and chicken enchiladas.

Zodiac Sign: I don’t know? My birthday is June 9th – HINT HINT – and I will be older than I’ve ever been before.

Tag, you're it.