I Know You Are, But What Am I?

You know you're fat when......

You put on some pants in the dressing room only to gasp in horror at the reflection in the adds-ten-pounds-I'm-sure-of-it full length mirror. You stare in disbelief at how wretched these pants make you look, how wide and lumpy and vast. You vow to yourself that you would never EVER buy these pants even if they were 75% off. Even if you had a Gift Card. Even if they were black and 75% off and you had a Gift Card. These pants make you look like Fun House Mirror Girl. They are awful. AWFUL!

Then you realize....

These are your pants. The ones you wear every other day.

Sigh.