Wednesday, April 15, 2009

Return of the Glam

I'm coming out of hiding to declare the evils of Target Pharmacy!

That's not entirely true.

I'm coming out of hiding, yes, but it's more of a will to overcome. I didn't intend to abandon the blog and had plans to write about every pregnancy detail. I waited so long to become pregnant that I just knew I would want to commemorate every moment. Turns out I would rather forget most of the moments. Pregnancy, she has not been kind. So much so that I've had zero words for this blog, or more accurately, zero words that weren't AWFUL or TORTURE or HELL ON EARTH.

But ya'll, it's time to stop being polite. And start getting real.

Out of 32 weeks I've had maybe five days free of drama slash pain slash general horror. Of course there was the obligatory nausea and fatigue. Mood swings. Anxiety. Then at 23 weeks I had the standard glucose test given to all pregnant women. One quick swig of some orange soda substitute and a blood draw. A few days later my doctor called to say that my levels were "a bit high" and I would need to go to the hospital for a longer test. I said ok and dutifully arrived at Williamson Medical before the rooster crowed. The morning included Regis and Kelly, three blood draws and a violent reaction that had me puking into a trash can while the plebotomist rubbed a cold washcloth through my hair. The good news? I had to go back a week later and do it alllllll again. Second time was a charm in that I didn't puke but was a real kick in the pants in that yes, I have Gestational Diabetes.

This is where the pregnancy delights went to E-LEV-EN.

Basically, my placenta is a drama queen and overreacts with the hormones causing my insulin to go nuts. This is not good for baby. I was promptly sent to see a specialist, since I'm now considered High Risk, who told me all kinds of terrible things that could happen to the baby. He literally said to me "well now your risk of stillbirth is up 40%". WELL OK. Why don't you tell me how to fix this instead of telling me things that make me cry, hmmmm??? Then I was sent to a Dietician who informed me that food would become my enemy and I would now have to jam a needle in my finger four times a day.

Since the diagnosis I've been put on medication, had my dosage upped four times, been threatened that I may have to give myself insulin shots three times a day, made weekly visits to the specialist as well as weekly monitoring PLUS my regular OB visits, the challenge of figuring out the right combination for every meal and assigned snack all of which I must write down and fax to the Dietician once a week AND I didn't even get to eat dessert at my baby shower! Or any of the candy in my Easter basket!

But ok, so far Harry is doing great. And his safety and health is my #1 focus and the reason I'm doing all of this. Without him I would definitely fall off the diet wagon. Forget a pill or two. Not care. But because of him I'm Tyra Banks FIERCE about my diet and medication and doctor's visits and the whole lot.

And maybe that's why I've decided to write down the gory details. Because even though pregnancy has been difficult (understatement) and not what I had hoped for, this little guy who's currently kicking my bladder into oblivion is worth every case of scorching heartburn. Worth the finger pricks and "no thank you I can't eat that". Worth the drama and backaches and irritation.

And I cannot wait to meet him.